interpersonal familiarity

Familiarity in relationships is a major threat to its success. However, it is a common and natural condition that needs to be managed well with wisdom as it is prevalent in many aspects of life.

Why is familiarity such a common scene in our daily lives?

Consider doing the same routine every day. You wake up every day and do the same thing over and over again, and you get used to it until it suddenly becomes boring, no matter how exciting it was initially. This sums up the saying “variety is the spice of life”. Human beings, for their part, are always hungry for new adventure, exploration, and change.

The most exciting routines/activities can lose their excitement over time if not accompanied by other activities.

This is why a person may desperately search for a job because he or she is tired of doing nothing. But once they find one and start working, you’ll still hear them complain about how tiring the job is. The point of contention here is not the work but the boredom they continue to get from indulging in the same routine. This is completely normal.

How does familiarity affect relationships?

Familiarity with relationships is also known as “seeing the end.” This is one of the biggest fears for many people, especially those willing to invest time, emotion, and resources.

Many people can’t help but wonder why becoming familiar with someone causes them to lose interest so quickly. Aren’t lovers supposed to be intimate and inseparable? Why do we lose the spark after the honeymoon period?

Ms. Janet, 22, had her own complaints to share. she wrote during the consultation, and I quote. “I thought I was everything he wanted and when he started pursuing me he would constantly reach out and make every effort to meet me. Given his consistent affection, I decided to give him a chance.

Everything went well, we chatted every day and met regularly when we had free time.

The chemistry and attraction is so strong that we often crave each other’s presence. It got to the point where we couldn’t give each other space because we felt that giving each other space might lead to a loss of interest, but unfortunately, the opposite happened and interest started to wane after a few months. There are no misunderstandings and no disagreements.

The chemical reaction will naturally decrease. We started to see each other as friends rather than partners. Maybe we accomplished everything in a short period of time, so there was no excitement anymore. The spark faded and the meeting eventually turned from excitement to boredom.

Married couples are not excluded either. Many married people cheat because they suffer from this familiar syndrome that affects their marriages, despite their initial efforts and vows.

They expect the chemistry from their courtship to continue, but all to no avail. As familiarity grows, they begin to lose the sexual attraction in their marriage. The consequence is usually infidelity.

However, there are exceptions to these vulnerabilities. Familiarity can have a detrimental effect on a marriage, but that doesn’t mean every marriage will suffer.

There are many couples who have celebrated their silver, golden and diamond jubilee. Despite spending several years together. They didn’t lose the spark, but kept rekindling it against all odds.

So what’s their secret? Why do they never get tired of waking up and seeing the same face every day? Their secret is simple! Understand the familiarity of relationships and effective ways to deal with them. This brings us to our next heading, which is how to deal with this syndrome called “familiarity.”

Be familiar with relationships, their causes, consequences and how to curb it.

Exceeded expectations.

This is one of the main reasons for familiarity in relationships. When it comes to attraction, we always create a fantasy or standard of what we expect from our partner because we think they are perfect. With this fantasy, we create an imaginary relationship that is very different from reality, and over time, if this expectation does not match reality, we become dissatisfied and easily bored. The way around this is to lower your expectations for anyone you meet, especially if you have the intention of building a long-term relationship.

In addition, excessive expectations can also lead to familiarity in interpersonal relationships. People think that marriage is satisfactory and it is easy to achieve compatibility and understanding, without realizing that sometimes the opposite may be the case and it is the only way to maintain status. The status quo was achieved through joint efforts.

hypocritical.

This is another obvious reason for relationship familiarity. These factors are similar to having too high expectations in that pretense can fuel your desired standards or expectations for an individual.

Many times, people pretend a lot during the initial stages of a relationship or the courtship phase in order to attract the love of a potential partner. The personalities they display during the courtship phase are often very different from the personalities their partners are used to. Gradually, the spark began to fade until it was almost invisible. Couples who hide their personalities early in a relationship can easily lose attraction because they both seem to be living in a fantasy world.

The excitement and euphoria that once existed in the relationship quickly evaporated when it became apparent that everyone was acting out a script and no one was real. Couples who have been married for many years and still live happily together can achieve this by showing their authentic selves from the courtship stage.

Every stage of their marriage seemed exciting and new, the sparks kept igniting, and because they were transparent to each other, there were no other special moments to look forward to, nor any other standards to look forward to.

infatuation.

Another reason for familiarity in a relationship is infatuation. Many people mistake feelings of infatuation for love and rush into relationships that are driven by emotion and intimacy rather than genuine feelings. Imagine being attracted to someone just because they look sexy and hot in bed.

Obviously, sex is the main factor that keeps the relationship going, and if you insist on indulging in it on a regular basis, the relationship will lose its excitement and become boring faster than expected.

This is where people tend to claim familiarity sets them apart. This familiarity is not based on the fact that they continue to have sex, but on the fact that they have nothing else to add interest to their relationship except intimacy.

If sex were the main cause of familiarity in a relationship, I’m sure most married couples would divorce within a few months of marriage because they must have grown tired of intimacy. But often the opposite is true, and they still get moved despite often being intimate.

Lack of mutual respect.

Most of the time, what keeps a relationship thriving is usually not the years spent together, but the mutual respect that both parties have.

When something is easy to obtain and available, it’s normal to take it for granted.

Many times in relationships, people get attracted and fall in love, and then both parties start acting strangely, causing their amount of emotional expression to drop. It’s easy to blame it on familiarity, as both parties get along well in the initial stages, but a lack of mutual respect often plays a crucial role here.

When couples respect each other, they won’t be willing to do anything that might jeopardize the future of their relationship.

Lack of space.

No matter how exciting and fun a relationship is, you need to give each other space when necessary.

Everyone desires their privacy. A time of solitude and sober reflection. This does not necessarily mean that they isolate themselves from others.

It’s natural to get bored with someone when you have to be with them all the time. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. This euphoria comes from missing each other and then trying to catch up after being apart for a while. It feels like first love time.

Everything looks fresh and charming. Couples sometimes need some time apart in other ways to restore their chemistry and spark their interest again. Frequent phone calls and text messages can also create a sense of familiarity.

Clingy and needy.

These two traits are common reasons why people lose so much respect for their partners.

You remember when they can’t get enough of your attention, the more distance you create, the harder they pursue you.

Until you give in and become so attached that you minimize their efforts to keep you. Being clingy and needy can cause you to lose the confidence that attracted them to you in the first place.

As a result, they may start to take you for granted. As your love grows, learn to control your emotions and direct your thoughts. Keep it natural and moderate and don’t exaggerate things because of strong emotions.