The Fascinating Psychology Behind the Popularity of MILF

In the book A Billion Wicked Thoughts, neuroscientists Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam analyzed the contents of over a billion searches on some of the most popular porn sites. They found a lot of interesting things, including the fact that the most popular search term on Pornhub (one of the most heavily visited tube sites in the entire world) was “mom.” This book was published in 2012, but if you flash forward to today, moms are still incredibly popular in adult entertainment.

For example, in 2018, “mom” was the sixth most popular search term on Pornhub, while MILF was the third most popular term. That’s right—two of the top six searches on Pornhub are all about mom figures. Given these numbers, it’s no surprise that MILF is among the most-viewed categories on the site.

So what is that? What explains the enduring appeal of MILF-themed porn? I answered this question in a recent column over at Men’s Health and it turns out that there’s a very rich psychology underlying this sexual interest.

I used data I collected as part of my book Tell Me What You Want to shed light on the subject. I collected information from over 4,000 people on their sexual fantasies and personalities, which allowed me the unique opportunity to look at what our fantasies say about us.

Among other things, the appeal of MILF porn stems partly from the fact that many men are just turned on by the idea of submitting to a dominant, powerful woman. Indeed, I found that the more straight men fantasized about MILFs, the more fantasies they had about being submissive in general.

But it’s not just that—I also found that MILF fantasies were linked to having more attachment anxiety (i.e., feelings of insecurity and a fear of abandonment in relationships). For some men, then, their attraction to MILFs may actually come from a place of insecurity because being with a woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to ask for it may buffer those feelings of anxiety.

To learn more, including some of the other factors linked to MILF fantasies among heterosexual men, check out the full article over at Men’s Health.

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