Today’s video and post are about organizing your life and cleansing your personal space post-breakup.
It’s about letting go of persistent memories by removing memorabilia from your home, your phone, and your social media accounts. Should you get rid of everything that reminds you of your Ex, or is it important to keep something to remind yourself of why you once loved them? Regardless of the way the relationship ended, they were a part of your life for a reason; no matter how small of a reason that might have been.
I believe that the people you allow in your life are there for a purpose. Regardless of whether things do or don’t work out between the two of you, there’s always something that you learned during your time together. It may be things you need to understand about yourself, or it could be that you now realize that you’re repeating similar patterns that are keeping you stuck in an unfulfilling place.
It is important to clarify what led up to the demise of your relationship so that you don’t repeat it moving forward.
Of course, it is natural to be hurt, sad, or angry for a short time after a breakup, but holding onto things for long periods does not allow you to have proper closure. If you are not sure what happened to end your relationship, ask your Ex to give you some clarification. It is always better to know, than to spend years trying to understand what transpired.
Initially after a breakup, some people go to the extreme of removing every memory of their Ex, which can be a negative action that they end up regretting later on. Discarding everything that you shared as a couple, is usually done out of anger, rather than understanding the lessons you were supposed to learn during your time together in your partnership.
Some reminders can keep you from repeating a certain situation that didn’t serve you well. Other reminders can keep you stuck, and not allow you to move on, to finding a potential partner that’s much better suited for you.
Please don’t just reminisce about the good things you miss about them post-breakup. Think about what didn’t work between you and hold onto that. It may sound like a pessimistic approach, but it is a very realistic way to sum up your relationship. You have to look at all sides of what transpired to be able to move on in a healthy way.
Photo by Mike Greer
Okay, so saying all that, what memories should you keep, and what should you discard?
- Remove anything that triggers pain, anger, or repetitive sadness. This includes your social media photos of your Ex or as a happy couple! The fewer memories you have around you, the easier it is to move on and improve your well-being.
- Keep a few photos of your time together when you were happy but put them away in storage so they are not available to see every day. Photographs are very powerful and keep your heart in a confused state of mind for a long time.
- Remove the majority of memorabilia in your home that is holding you back from finding closure and fulfillment elsewhere. It could be articles of clothing or gifts that take you down memory lane every time you see them.
- Take time to analyze what transpired to end your relationship. It is equally important to understand what attracted you to your ex initially, and what pulled you apart in the end.
- If you were coming out of an abusive situation, you don’t want any memories close by to keep the painful experience alive. Seek counselling right away. It is very challenging to overcome the pain of an abusive partnership, and you will need guidance to help you through it all.
- Block your Ex from your social media accounts so you can’t see what they are up to at any given time.
- Ask your mutual friends not to talk about your Ex. The less you hear about what they’re up to, the better. You may have to take some time away from friends you spent time with as a couple because this will keep you thinking about your ex due to all the memories you shared as a group.
- Change up your environment from where you hung out socially with your ex. The last thing you want to do is bump into each other every time you are out. Going to new places will also help you meet new people!
- You may have to change your residence if it is causing you continual heartbreak every time you are home. At the very least, removing some of the bigger reminders can help. You could always organize a small renovation, especially in the bedroom! (A new bed is always a good idea!)
- Don’t make the mistake of thinking you can be friends right away after a breakup. There is far too much raw emotion in the first few months, which will continue to set you back each time you see your Ex or talk to them. Give it some time and maybe after a year or two you can revisit the friendship side of things.
Photo by Yan Krukau
Practice self-love daily
Practicing self-love is always important, whether you’re in a relationship or you’re single. This will help keep you from attracting the wrong people toward you because you love and respect yourself enough to know what you deserve. Be grateful for all the experiences you have had in your life. This will help you to move forward onto a better path each time you honor, the growth you endured.
When you nurture yourself with kindness and accept your choices when it comes to matters of the heart, you will have a clearer picture of what you may need to alter. Life is one big learning curve, and it is really important to own any part you play in some of those questionable moments you have allowed. No one gets it right immediately, and we all have memories that cause us some sadness over the years. When you practice self-love, you understand that you are human and forgiveness is a big part of that tough learning curve.
Each relationship that you have in your life brings you closer to meeting a reciprocated love connection.
We all have a past, and most of us have had relationships before we meet our potential life partner. There will always be dating scenarios and some relationships that we’d like to forget, but there is usually a valuable lesson that you’re supposed to learn within each situation. Unfortunately, sometimes we take a long time to understand what that means.
This is why it is important to understand the difference between holding onto a few private moments regarding your Ex, versus wanting to keep everything visible on your phone/social media, about your past relationship. Letting go of an Ex is very difficult, but it’s even more burdensome if you keep those memories close to your heart.
There is a reason the cliché “out of sight out of mind” is a true statement.
When you remove visual memories, you think about your ex less and less as time goes by. The last thing a new love prospect wants to see is numerous photos of your ex-partner. They want to be assured that you have moved on 100%.
Your everyday routine will need to be altered to some degree for you to be able to heal your heart. This is very natural, and it allows you to move forward without all the reminders staring you in the face. It also helps you let go of regrets, anger, and resentment because your thoughts will be on other things. The less time you spend thinking about your past partnership, your heart will soon be able to let go. Your Ex has moved on, and it is time for you to do so as well.
*Please watch the video below for more information on today’s topic! I love to hear from you, so please leave your comments under the post and I will answer you back! Thank you for stopping by!
Thank you, Sybersue xo <3
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