How to Finger Someone – A Guide for Men and Women

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Finger play is often hastily dismissed or completely ignored in most pillow dates. It’s seen as a way to get the other person lubed up so they can quickly get into penetration. Or, to get someone to orgasm so the other person can get their own pleasure.

But fingering can be exciting in its own right.

That’s why we’ve created this in-depth guide on how to finger someone in the safest, most pleasurable way possible—so that you both benefit in ways you might not even realize. Let’s get started!

Keep it clean and tidy

There is nothing more off-putting than a dirty finger trying to slide into your vagina or anus. Yes, I know some people think it’s crazy to think that dirty fingers in the anus are okay. But it is true.

The first thing anyone should do is make sure their hands are clean – thoroughly! Do not rinse them quickly under water. Next, nails should be trimmed short and filed.

This last point is non-negotiable—for men, too. It doesn’t matter how prudish you think having neat nails is. Because it is crucial for fingering.

Long fingernails (even short ones that are poorly trimmed, have sharp edges, and are not filed down) can scratch the lining of your vagina. The flesh there is delicate, and even tiny tears can occur. This can lead to greater susceptibility to infection, and possibly even STDs. Not to mention, it can be uncomfortable for your partner. The same goes for men. The anus is also delicate; the same thing can happen if you penetrate it with a bare finger.

Now, the best way to have anal sex is to put a condom on your finger (or a real latex finger condom made for this sort of thing). However, if you have long, jagged nails, you can still pierce the latex and bad things can happen. See what I mean?

So keep those numbers clean!

But at the same time, the other side should also be washed, especially on a day with a lot of sweat.

Beware of sexually transmitted infections

Both parties should be 100% honest about what medical conditions they have so that the other person can make an informed decision. Additionally, you can take appropriate safety measures. Because if the person being fucked touches themselves afterwards, they can still contract diseases like gonorrhea, chlamydia, or HPV (for example).

If you have sex, be sure to get regular checkups and use appropriate contraceptive measures.

Adding lubricant

Some people believe that any sexually competent person should be able to get someone wet all on their own. And the idea of ​​needing lubrication can actually be a turnoff to some people.

Well, I have to say that this is nonsense.

televisionThere are many reasons why no matter how excited you make them, they can’t really get wet, or even a little wet. This could be a side effect of medication, a health issue, general stress issues, age, or just the body’s personal setting, etc. Plus, there’s the fact that the butt hole simply can’t produce lubrication.

Get yourself a bottle Water-based lubricant, Even if you haven’t gotten into the inner game yet, there’s quite a bit of content that can be added. It will make a world of difference.

Understanding Anatomy

Vaginas come in all different shapes, colors, and smells, but florals aren’t one of them. As long as it doesn’t smell rotten or strongly fishy, ​​it’s fine (as that could mean an infection).

The same goes for penises. Some have cutouts, some don’t. Some men like their balls fondled, some don’t. But regardless, there’s a lot more to each area than the “best part” we usually focus on.

Before you start working on your fingers, stretch your surrounding area. There are many nerve endings there.

Do not worry

It’s important not to insert your fingers too quickly into your vagina, but it’s even more important in your anus. The muscles in your anus are very tight, and anything inserted too quickly or too hard can be very painful.

No matter which hole, One finger Then slowly (using lubrication) insert at your partner’s pace. When (or if) they are ready, add another finger. But be sure to take your time each time you add a new finger.

Listen to your partner

This part will almost certainly determine how someone’s “success” or not is judged.

Make sure to not only listen to the sounds of pleasure (or discomfort) they make, but also gently ask them what’s working and what’s not if they might be a little quiet or not very good at expressing their needs.

Do they want to go slower? Or use just one finger? Or withdraw completely and go back to external play? Maybe they need a different angle or a change of position.

Communication is always key.

Keep the rhythm

When our partner is in a state of ecstasy, we may be tempted to change what we are doing and find something more pleasurable.

However, this is the last thing you should do. If you find that your partner likes something, stick with it. They may want it faster, harder, etc. (let them tell you.) But don’t switch from two-finger G-spot massage to clitoral tickling and finger penetration when the previous method is driving them crazy.

When you find what works and stick with it until you reach your peak, you can achieve amazing orgasms.

If you’re not sure, there are other ways besides stroking to simulate thrusting. There are also tapping, pressing, circular motions, back and forth “slides”, etc.

Other useful suggestions

• External-only play still counts as fingering even if nothing is plugged in
• Be patient, gentle, and supportive when having anal sex for the first time. This can often be very nerve-wracking because it can be scary.
• Tramp Game Nothing to do with being gay. Straight guys, you are missing out on some amazing fun. You have the exact same nerve endings as gay people. Give it a try!
• Try crossing your index and middle fingers. While you’re inside, you can rotate them for a unique feel.
• If your fingers get tired, you can definitely use sex toys to help you get back on track for round two. There are even fingering toys that can help.
• Not everyone likes direct clitoral contact. Some prefer it on top or underneath.
• Try playing with the perineum area. It’s delicious.
• Don’t use pornography as a guide. It’s usually inaccurate.
• Do you know when to stop? When your partner says so. It’s that simple.
• Add other sexy elements like kissing, licking, nibbling earlobes, etc.
• You can totally do this with your clothes on if your partner needs/wants it.
• Maintaining eye contact can appear very intimate.
• Once you are done, if there is another pillow date in the future, ask them how it worked out, if they were satisfied, etc. Show that you care.

How to finger someone – Ending Thoughts

The biggest takeaway from this article is to keep it clean, slow down, explore, and communicate. So the next time things get heated in the bedroom (or anywhere), why not spend an entire session just fingering? You might discover something surprising!