How marriage counseling can improve our early lives

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I ended one of my XY Code posts the other day by saying that I wished that online Christian marriage coaching had been available when Lori and I were newly married.

I thought it might be helpful for me to reflect on our situation.

I once said that when we get married, our only problem is sex. Of course, this isn’t true. Yes, sex is a big issue that plagues us every day, but there are other things that need to be addressed. Today I know that doing some of these jobs will help our sex lives. A good coach can bring these other issues to light and convince me to do some work there, even if sex is still an issue.

Another mistake made at the time was assuming that the sexual issues were all about Lowry. She was molested and raped and struggled with those things, so we know that about her. But I also have sexual stuff. Even though I hadn’t watched porn in years, my libido was still poisoned by it. I had problems because of my mother’s attitude towards men and sex, and the high school girlfriend I was dating.

A good male coach can show me these problems and allow me to solve them. This will make sex easier and will take some of the pressure off Lori, making it easier for her to handle her own affairs.

I’m talking about a male coach because honestly, I don’t hear that from a female. I would have thought she was siding with Lori or not understanding how important sex is to men. By the way, this is why I am so passionate about marriage coaching as a couple. It feels safer when everyone is represented and there is someone who can speak both spouses’ languages ​​and hold their feet to the fire if needed.

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