Knowledge Dissemination

How do you pick your dildos? What are the most important…


Hope everyone had a toy filled weekend 🙂

I love looking at the huge collections of toys and dildos people have here on Reddit. It is really impressive.

I was wondering what are the most important factors in choosing a dildo? Look? Realism? Texture? Firmness? Size? I’d love to hear how you pick your dildos.

View Reddit by FunInBedToysView Source

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40 thoughts on “How do you pick your dildos? What are the most important…

  1. Verified-Customer says:

    Honestly, I prefer a suction cup and ones that are veiny and more realistic. I’m not a fan of the super smooth ones

  2. Verified-Customer says:

    I really like fantasy style ones, but I know most people think that’s weird. Vibration is an important factor. So is the material itself and hard firmness or being semi firm is preferred for me, but again not everyone likes that so I have a few that are kinda soft. Honestly I like glass alot for masturbation but not at all for play.

  3. Verified-Customer says:

    R e l I s t I c

  4. Verified-Customer says:

    Girth, Large mushroom, fairly stiff

  5. Verified-Customer says:

    For me it’s how convenient/hands-free it is and how intense the buzz/movement/thrust its going to offer

  6. Verified-Customer says:

    Thickness and flexibility

  7. Verified-Customer says:

    OMG OP thanks for the questions. I’ve been wanting to get more dildos. I’m learning so much. I’m also looking for any information on glass dildos on here

  8. Verified-Customer says:

    Size,shape,length are to me the factors

  9. Verified-Customer says:

    I focus on waht my aim is with it. So am I just prostate massaging, local anal hole streatching, or streatching the colon at depth. For example, if I want, anal streatching with prostate massaging, I go for a 10 in something firm or Ridgid and girth so over 2 in in girth. That way it really can slam the spot and widen me up. If it’s just anal cavty 6 in and go for fisting girth but lots of give so I can work on widening the hole and making my cavity accommodate. If it’s depth I want flexabitly and softness and go for lenght.

  10. Verified-Customer says:

    I’m big on texture, features and size.

    If I’m looking for something I want to use for myself, it’s usually an average size with an interesting shape or texture. I just bought one that heats itself too which is an interesting concept I never knew about.

    I do have a few ‘larger’ toys I’ve used with partners in the past, just because they enjoyed that. With those I like going full fantasy. But honestly, they’re not something I pull outta the toy box when I’m playing alone.

  11. Verified-Customer says:

    For me it’s price. I try to find the best one I can for whatever budget I have available.

  12. Verified-Customer says:

    Size, and how realistic it looks and feels

  13. Verified-Customer says:

    cost and the material it’s made of are most important imo. after that i’d say the overall look and size

  14. Verified-Customer says:

    Start small then work your way bigger.

  15. Verified-Customer says:

    Size and Shape

    * I look for a size that will be comfortable and pleasurable based on my experience level. For beginners, I recommend starting with a smaller, slimmer dildo around 4-6 inches insertable length and 1-1.25 inches in diameter.
    * The shape also matters – whether I want a curved shaft for G-spot stimulation, a bulbous head, or a more graduated/tapered shape.


    * I prioritize body-safe, non-porous materials like silicone, glass, or stainless steel that are easy to clean and won’t harbor bacteria.
    * Silicone is my top choice as it has great flexibility and texture.


    * I prefer non-realistic designs over overly realistic ones. Fun, bright colors, and sleek shapes allow me to disassociate from anatomical replicas.
    * A flared or suction cup base is handy for hands-free play.


    * If I want vibrations or pulsations, I’ll look for a high-quality rechargeable dildo with multiple speeds and patterns.
    * For anal use, a flared base is an absolute must-have for safety.

    Overall, the dildo’s size, shape, material safety, design appeal, and functionality for my intended use are the key factors I consider. I aim to strike the right balance between pleasurable sensations and ensuring the toy will be body-safe, easy to use, and able to meet my needs comfortably.

  16. Verified-Customer says:

    If it’s not silicone then I don’t buy it. I look at thickness and length. Suction cups are helpful when alone but not a deal breaker.

  17. Verified-Customer says:

    size and texture are the most important for me, then appearance since I really dont like anything thats trying to look like a real dick

  18. Verified-Customer says:

    I can’t do anything huge ifs it’s not soft, like really soft (as soft as a real dick would be).

    I’m not sure if this just a me problem, but the harder ones especially if they’re huge hurt like hell and I can’t handle them.

    I would like something that vibrates, although not necessary since I like to use a wand along side it.

  19. Verified-Customer says:

    It must be body-safe, so high quality and definitely the size, shape and texturing matter most but I do really love having my favorite color schemes on them!

  20. Verified-Customer says:

    Texture first, because I’m highly sensitive to it. Then shape, in order to make sure it will hit the right spots rather than simply feel like something going in and out of me. Next color, because I prefer mine to be pretty. And finally concept, because some fantasy toys really appeal to the monster fucker in me, or are a bit deterring.

  21. Verified-Customer says:

    For me, body safety and it HAS to be pretty. Something that makes me feel like a star 💫😆 It has to be beautiful! Love any pretty colors and shapes, luminescence etc… oh also I like a good suction cup

  22. Verified-Customer says:

    Texture, material(body sensitive), size, and color…..I like fun colored dildos. Idk why, but they look nice going in and out.

  23. Verified-Customer says:

    Most important factors to me are size, shape, and squish/firmness.

    I’m a total size queer and love 8+, girthy, has balls and has some give but isn’t floppy.

    Currently, I am loving the Shaft model A 8.5″ but have really been wanting some Mr Hankeys Toys.

    Most of the time I opt for realistic but like the idea of some fantasy/sci-fi styles. 🐙

  24. Verified-Customer says:


  25. Verified-Customer says:

    First and foremost is it made with body safe material. Then whatever I feel is missing from the collection or desires I may have.

  26. Verified-Customer says:

    First : safe material
    Second : textures of the sextoy
    Third : look of the sextoy

  27. Verified-Customer says:

    22(m) rather new to Butt stuff but already collecting.

    I started off with hard materials (the Njoy pure wand, and the Twisted Love Glass Dildo by A&E) and when I finally tried something soft (albeit small) I hated it.

    So far my biggest checkmark is glass. It takes temp nice, it feels really warm coming in and out, and it’s very slippery but rigid, giving it a gliding sensation that’s just amazing, also a slight curve (as with the twisted love, and Gläs 11 inch) is nice.

    I haven’t tried anything realistic, or firmer rubber types, butt I’m interested.

  28. Verified-Customer says:

    Shape, I prefer realistic shape and pronounced head, I also look into length and width, nothing too big, and I like they come in nice color, also material I want it to be safe so I’d look for silicone or glass and avoid anythyng tpe/tpr. Also the price and shipping are important factors to have in mind. I

    ‘d love them to be uncut but can’t find the one I like.

  29. Verified-Customer says:

    I love how you wished as a nice weekend with those words. I hope your weekend was toy filled also! ☺️

    For me a few things are relevant. Firstly – it has to be body safe. Then from there definitely the size/shape (girth and length – I prefer smaller to average sizes). The texture (I prefer softer ones if it’s silicone). I don’t really care if it’s realistic or not – as long as I know that I’ll enjoy using it and it will work with my body – then it’s great!

  30. Verified-Customer says:


  31. Verified-Customer says:

    Material is number one. Can’t be smelly/toxic. I like platinum silicone. I prefer them to be on the softer side. You lose some ease of use, but gain comfort and the ability to size up easier.

    My personal favorite is Topped Toys. They’re a bit pricey, but you get what you pay for.

    I like unique textures, and to have a variety in both length and girth

  32. Verified-Customer says:

    I look at shape first, then follow up with what will the texture be like if I’m curious or not. I enjoy smoothness the most but I sometimes like little texture and look at firmness of silicone. Then I look at size the girth and length combo. I personally love decent length to go deep but also enough to fill stretched out if I want something bigger. But for average size, in between those two is best for me. Realistic doesn’t matter to me as much. Or fantasy aspect. It’s fun to explore and see what can surprise you.

  33. Verified-Customer says:

    A fun whimsical shape, ideally fantasy inspired as I don’t like realistic dildos. I like interesting textures but they have to be very pronounced, not like a little bit of veining or whatever.

  34. Verified-Customer says:

    Wife and I talked about this the other day. We only have one dildo and it’s just a glow in the dark one since we didn’t want one that looked super realistic. I guess however, that the dildo is too hard? It ends up hurting more often than not whenever we use it which is mostly in couple play when using my fingers isn’t the best option. She’s used it on herself once, when her other two toys were dead. Can’t afford to spend a huge amount on toys either but I would like to get her one that doesn’t hurt like that.

  35. Verified-Customer says:

    Realism and firmness is most important to me. It should look and feel like a real dong 🙂

  36. Verified-Customer says:

    For my gorgeous wife, no ridges, fairly smooth and very thick

  37. Verified-Customer says:

    Size (not excessively long or thick), texture (needs to have some, not slick) realistic is good, with balls to give you something to hang onto.

  38. Verified-Customer says:

    shape honestly. if it’s pretty and glittery that’s just a bonus

  39. Verified-Customer says:

    Make sure you have these prerequisites addressed before a purchase :

    -Dual density construction.

    -Platinum cured silicone (yes, those specific words. Just silicone is fine too in most cases, but platinum cured is just that much better for skin safety).

    -100% waterproof. Important in order to be able to wash the thing.

    -Strong suction cup for hands free action.

    -A more pronounced head/ridge if your focus is P-spot/G-spot stimulation.

    -Never purchase when you’re feeling horny/excited. Let a couple of days pass, then revisit your choices, and then finally decide. Cuz a crazy, horny mind makes everything on the net look sexy.

    Rest is all your personal preference. Good luck.

  40. Verified-Customer says:

    it’s really a combination of things, but if i had to pick one i’d say shape.

    interesting curves, ridges and angles is what makes a design feel more unique than the same design in different firmness/material.

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