Experts say how to make the argument less painful

Enough.

Experts usually guarantee that it is normal for couples to occasionally disagree in a healthy relationship. Despite a little back and forth here and here – there is said to be a way to do this without becoming disastrous.

Harvard professor Julia Minson leads a team of psychologists, negotiators and computational linguists. After years of extensive research, the Brainiac Group has found that people should focus on changing their behavior rather than trying to convince others to change their thinking or feelings when having intense discussions.

“One of the simplest behaviors to change is what you say,” she wrote in a conversation.

After analyzing the hot topic differences among people, Minson and her team discovered a way of communication called “conversation acceptance,” a style composed of words and phrases that lead to more positive results in arguments.

The acronym makes it easy to remember and apply this healthy approach to controversy.

H stands for “held your claim.” Minson advises people to be confident in their beliefs, even if they think others will doubt them.

E stands for “emphasized agreement”. The team of experts says you can’t walk out the door in a hot mood, so finding something in common with your loved ones is always key.

One represents “recognizing opposing views.” Make sure another person in the argument feels it so they know that you are actually listening and understanding their perception of things.

R stands for “reconstituting positive”. Minsen suggests that people eliminate negative, definitive words from the argument. No need to shout “no” or “no” when you go back and forth with your partner.

But before you even get into a healthy communication toolbox, writer Rachel Bowie believes that the key to avoiding yourself circling with other important people is “always assume good intentions.”

“It’s obvious when your spouse drives you crazy, it’s obvious when it works.”

“Assuming good intentions act reminds us that in fact, we are together in difficult situations, allowing us to reimagine a moment of chaos and remind me to pause, recover and put it in my spouse’s shoes.”

Adopt “‘OK, maybe there’s more story here before I blow my own lid? Maybe it’s a tough afternoon. Maybe the baby starts crying into a troublesome game. Maybe my husband should have a little grace,” Bowie wrote.

She emphasized in the article that “it’s more about making room for productive and thoughtful dialogue, reducing conflict and developing together…”