When Aging Parents Test Your Marriage

Podcast: Download

Let’s talk about aging parents. This is a common marital problem among middle-aged couples, and it seems to be getting worse.

There are a lot of potential struggles. It could be Mom’s memory, or Dad shouldn’t be driving anymore. It could be a health issue, or it could be that a parent can no longer live alone but still wants to. Some parents will fight for the help they need, while others want their children to give up their lives for every little thing.

This can be difficult if you and your wife are on the same page and are both trying to do what you think is right. But it won’t destroy your marriage. However, real problems arise when you and your wife disagree on what needs to be done or how much should be done.

We are told to honor our parents, and I certainly think helping them grow old is part of that. But there must be boundaries. Expecting you to drive across the state or fly across the country on a regular basis is unacceptable. We told Lori’s mother that we would be happy to take care of her if necessary, but that she would have to move in with us.

You have to decide what is the real need that no one else can meet. You have to consider the demands your children and your marriage require on your time and energy.

Additionally, your parents must be reasonable to you and your wife. Her parents need to reason with you both too. Do not tolerate insults or slander.

If you’re not already in this season, now is the time to talk to your wife about what’s coming. This is also a good time to start setting better boundaries. If you’re already involved, ongoing discussion is crucial. If the two of you can’t find common ground, you may want to seek help.

Sacrificing your marriage for your parents is wrong and unbiblical!

Image credit: © Paul H Byerly created using stockdreams.ai
Amazon Shopping ❖ Store provided link page
We support donations and appreciate your help!
This post may contain affiliate links, please see my disclosure.

Relevant