5 things to note for beginners

Since both swingers and polyamory are “open relationships,” they share many similarities. However, the difference between the two lies in the number of people, location, and the emotions involved.

A swinger pair might be in the same room but have sex with other people (sometimes together). There is more emotional connection in polyamory, while swinging can be more casual – Think “friends with sex” and hooking up. Some polyamorous couples are also swingers, so don’t worry!

We’re assuming you and your partner have already discussed this and are eager to get started. But if you still need to have that conversation, stop reading and just have the conversation! There is no room for misunderstanding when jealousy could permanently damage your relationship.

Are you a party or club couple? Perhaps a swingers cruise is more your thing? You both need to come to a mutual understanding and set any limits. For example, if you have sex with the same person and one of you isn’t enjoying it, should you both back off or allow the other to continue?

Hosts usually provide sex toys, but it is also a good idea to bring your own. There is no guarantee that there will be enough food to eat! Alternatively, you may prefer to use your own toys; for example, if you are particularly sure that a dildo has not been inserted into your anus before using it.

Likewise, most places will have lube and condoms on hand, but it’s always good to bring your own – especially if you have allergies or need a larger/smaller-than-average condom size.

It’s like dating: use an app like Quiver and put yourself out there! Swinger sites like Kasidie ​​and Swapfinder.com are fun places to explore local optionsWe welcome newbies, but please remember that You don’t have to agreeNot everyone will please you, but be friendly—you never know who you might run into at a potluck dinner!

If the thought of having sex in the middle of a party leaves you drier than a harsh white wine, Inviting a couple back to your hotel or a secluded hotel is an exciting entry point to partner swappingSexy games like Path to Pleasure and Let’s F*ck! are a lively way to break the ice.

You might think that a swinger party would be a place for fake masks and latex outfits, but that’s not the case. On a typical night, most people will be wearing regular clothes and sexy lingerie. Choose an outfit that you will feel comfortable in and can easily take off when you go to a nightclub or bar.

It’s best to save your fetish clothing for themed parties or BDSM-specific groups. Choose fetish-friendly accessories that subtly communicate your kinksuch as collars or bib shorts.

Two common misconceptions among newbies are that a) anything can happen, especially in a sex club, and b) you have Have sex with everyone. There are a lot of people watching; you don’t have to hang up the phoneThat said, if you have any fantasies you’d like to try out—for example, if you’re a man in an M4F relationship but are curious about other men—swinging is a great way to explore them.

Unlike dogging, swinging does not automatically mean that touching is “free to use.” Therefore, ask before touching, and do not join group play without permission. Some clubs even have a “just ask once” policy If you ignore this, you may get kicked out or banned. It may feel like a parody of inviting something to dance, but the more you do it, the more comfortable you will feel.