Why every single woman wants to date a married man: Jana

Something caught my attention this week that reveals a deep, dark, and shameful secret about single women.

Many of us — okay, let me be clear, not me (this time) — seem to be like bulls to red rags when it comes to married men.

It seems that many people view wedding rings as a challenge. Shameful, shameful, shameful behavior.

Don’t believe it? I have proof.

You see, it all started with my Saucy Secrets confessionals that I host every Monday night on Instagram. A man wrote in: “I’ve been married for 2.5 years and I’ve never had so many women approach me. When I was single, hardly anyone noticed me. I don’t like the attention, but is that normal?”

This intrigued me, so I created a poll asking, “Men… have you noticed that more women are courting you after you’ve been married?” The results were astonishing. Over 10,000 men responded to the survey, and 74% said “yes.”

Here I was, looking for an attractive single man to make my heart flutter, and my fellow single sisters were all giving looks and nods to married men.

No girls, no.

One of my female followers made a funny comment about this trend in my DMs, saying, “It’s because his wife made him better and probably bought him a new outfit and new skincare products.” It made me laugh, but at the same time, I think she had a point.

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but my friends and I have always been outraged by the high rates of poor hygiene among single men. Whether it’s bad breath, smelly bedrooms, dirty dishes in the sink or not ironing clothes on time, many seem to be failing to take care of basic hygiene. Toothbrushes, lads – use them.

So I think she was onto something.

Look around any office these days and you’ll see single Steve, in a wrinkled shirt he found on his bedroom floor, heating up last night’s Chinese takeaway for lunch, while married Martin, in a neatly pressed suit, holds a healthy lunch lovingly prepared by his attractive wife.

OK, that might be an exaggeration, but it’s pretty close. Am I right, ladies?

But upon further reflection, I believe there is a deeper reason for this attraction to married men, and it’s simple.

It all comes down to the allure of stability and success. These men give the impression of having it all – financial stability, emotional maturity, and, even more alluringly, they are clearly not afraid of commitment.

A man wearing a wedding ring symbolizes a man who dares to say, “Let’s start a relationship” – and he literally walks down the aisle to prove it. In today’s dating environment, this feels like a unicorn. These days, getting someone in a relationship to agree to be a proper boyfriend is a difficult endeavor.

So, as much as I hate to admit it, it makes sense that this kind of poaching happens in bars and workplaces.

In fact, don’t just take my word for it. There is actual experimental evidence that single women are obsessed with other people’s partners—according to Journal of Experimental Social Psychology.

The survey showed that 90% of single women admitted that they would be attracted to men they thought were already in a relationship, while only 59% would be interested in single men.

Ladies, this man is not your man. He belongs to someone else, and we must (annoyingly) respect that.

For those who speak First Wives Clublet me put it this way — in this case, we want to be Goldie Hawn, not Sarah Jessica Parker.

So maybe our alternative is to dress up the bachelor. Pick one that catches your eye, take him on a date to the nearest men’s clothing store, teach him how to throw a load of clothes into the washing machine, and give him a toothbrush just to say “thinking of you.” Cute, right?

The excuse of “but all the good dogs are taken” is no longer valid. We need to train these singles and turn them into excellent hunting dogs. Oh, I can already hear the angry voices in the comments section.

Sit down, child, sit down.

Jana Hocking is a columnist and collector of “Similar Boyfriends” | @jana_hocking