What do couples need to have in common to make a marriage better?

One in four married Americans says their partner is their “complete opposite.”

That’s according to a new survey of 2,000 Americans who are in a relationship or married, which found that 26 percent believe their partner is the exact opposite of them.

The survey looked at how many people actually believe that opposites attract, and found that most people believe that opposites attract (73%), with women more likely to believe that opposites attract (74% vs. 69%).

Additionally, a survey conducted by Talker Research for LELO found that 65% of people believe that the “opposites attract” theory applies to them and their partners.

Respondents were divided according to personality indicators, finding that introverts tend to prefer extroverts (58%), while extroverts tend to prefer introverts (55%).

The stars also had something to say. Aries, Libra and Scorpio are the most likely to believe that opposites attract (76% each), while Taurus is the most skeptical (16%).

Geminis may prioritize finding someone different from them (25%), but the zodiac signs most likely to actually date someone of the opposite sex are Taurus (14%), Libra (11%) and Sagittarius (10%).

On the other hand, the people most likely to date someone of their own sign are Capricorns (16%) and Cancers (11%).

Despite respondents’ firm belief in the scientific truth that “opposites attract,” nearly half admitted they were looking for someone more similar when looking for a partner (47%), while only 21% were looking for the opposite.

The average American believes that two people should be 54% similar for a relationship to be successful.

In particular, respondents shared core values ​​(58%), family and future goals (54%), and relationship boundaries (48%) with their partner, ranking these as the three most similar areas.

They were least similar in career goals (16%), fitness and health (19%), and hobbies (22%); only 22% thought it was important to have similar sexual desires.

Respondents wanted their partners to be more similar in love language (22%), entertainment preferences (21%) and hobbies (21%); one in five wanted their sexual desires to be more aligned (18%).

“Romance stories often emphasize the persistent question of whether opposites attract, which has led to the misconception that different personalities are essential for a successful relationship. However, long-term experience shows that shared similarities, coupled with open communication and honesty, especially in intimacy, are the true foundation of stronger, healthier relationships,” said Luka Matutinovec, chief marketing officer of sexual wellness brand LELO.

There’s still time to change: A third of respondents said they initially felt more different from their partner (32%), but 60% said they now have more similarities than differences.

Three-quarters of respondents said their partner introduced them to new things that they would never have tried without them.

Even if they have differences, 8 in 10 people say their partner’s differences make them more complete, and vice versa (77%).

Their partners excel in areas they are not good at, such as car maintenance (35%), convenience at home (23%), saving money (18%), wrapping gifts (14%) and cooking (14%).

Despite the differences, most respondents can no longer imagine life without their partner (84%), including a majority who view their partner as the opposite of themselves (86%).

“When talking about differences (or similarities) between partners, it’s interesting to note that 47 percent of respondents believed that differences in sex toy preferences could lead to a more exciting intimate life. This just proves that, in all respects, even when it comes to things like deciding which toys a couple will use together, birds of a feather flock together,” says Matutinovich.

How interviewees and their partners are adapting to Opposites Attract:

• I am cheerful, outgoing and sociable while he is shy and introverted
• I like to be active but my wife is a couch potato
• My partner is serious and I’m super friendly with everyone
• He likes to sleep on a messy bed with many quilts, while I like to sleep on a tidy bed with fewer quilts.
• My husband is very calm and nothing upsets him, while I am the complete opposite: I get angry very quickly
• I’m a very worried person and he’s the exact opposite
• My husband loves all types of food and my palate is very limited
• I’m a night owl, he’s a morning person

• My partner likes quiet nights and I like to go out and socialize
• I’m calm and like to plan, while my husband is spontaneous and carefree
• My husband focuses on short-term plans while I tend to focus on long-term plans
• He loves mountains and hates beaches. I love the beach, choose it over the mountains
• He’s a country boy, I’m a city girl

Investigation method:

Talker Research surveyed 2,000 Americans in a relationship; the survey was commissioned by LELO and administered and conducted online by Talker Research from September 18 to September 24, 2025.