The Art of Transformation: When Marriage Needs Flexibility

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In the M*A*S*H TV series, Major Charles Emerson Winchester III said:

I do one thing at a time, do it well, and then move on.

It’s a nice feeling, but it’s not always possible. What’s more, this isn’t always wise.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, Lori and I are getting serious about homesteading. We have been adding garden space over the years and now have two areas totaling about half an acre. But there are deer. We once counted over 100 deer within three miles of our home. Come fall, they are in dire need of food. We have been working on making a nice fence to replace the T-posts and netting we are using. My son and I milled the posts, and Lori applied copper preservative to the bottoms and stained the rest. My son and I concreted half of it into the ground last Saturday. I expect to have everything done within a week starting Thursday.

Then we woke up today to find that the deer had started tearing at the netting. So Lori and I spent the entire day attaching the deer fence to posts in the ground and placing temporary T-posts to enclose the entire area. This was not how I planned to spend the day, and I was exhausted. But it had to be done, so we did it.

Sometimes, the only smart choice is to quit what you’re trying to do and do something that demands your attention. Sometimes your marriage needs this, and sometimes your wife needs you to do this for her. When this happens, it’s a pass failure. Either you’ll be a hero for doing what needs to be done, or you’ll be viewed by her as a loser for not stepping up.

By the way, having margin in your life makes it easier to do what needs to be done when those occasions come.

Image credit: © Paul H Byerly
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