Swinging 101 | Aldult Toys Blog

Have you ever thought about displaying a flamingo in your garden or an upside-down pineapple on your door? By that, of course, I mean, have you ever thought about swinging? Well, if so, or if you just want to know more about what swinging is, you’ve come to the right place.

In simple terms, swing is a form of ethical non-monogamy where couples like to have sex with other people…together. The types of sexual encounters and activities can take many forms and it is estimated that more than 1% of adults in North America consider themselves swingers.

How is swinging different from other forms of non-monogamy?

From monogamy to full blossoming polyamory the umbrella of open relationships is expansive. While polyamory invites individuals to form multiple emotional connections and romantic relationships, swinging is purely physical… without commitment.

Swinging is also unique because it is done as a couple and for the couple, not alone. Rather than seeking sex or love outside of your primary relationship (as is the case in many forms of ethical non-monogamy), swingers seek opportunities as a unit. This is why swinging most often takes the form of partner swapping. Don’t get me wrong, there are no hard and fast rules and it can include all sorts of things, like group sex And cuckolding.

What Swing Looks Like in 2023

Before the age of dating apps and sex chat rooms, swingers used a code of secret symbols like flamingo lawn decorations, upside-down pineapples (watch out for these if you ever go on a cruise), or wearing a black ring on the right hand.

The swing scene is now much more accessible than ever! As with most sexual preferences, there is an app for that. Apps and websites such as SwingLifeStyle.comeasy ways for couples to find other swingers nearby. Or just try your luck on generic dating apps — There are plenty of “couples looking for a third” or “couples looking for a couple” on Tinder/Hinge/Bumble.

Is swing just torque + torque?

Short answer: no.

Since no two people (or swingers) are the same, desires for sexual exploration vary from person to person or couple. Some couples are married and only want to swing with other married couples, while others may be looking for a single person to join them sexually.

Whether you’re in person or online, people usually identify as a couple or a solo swinger; as well as what they’re looking for so you can find the right dynamic for you!

Is swinging a good option for you and your partner?

The best way to know if swinging is right for you and your partner is to think about what you’re looking for. Are you looking for a shared sexual experience with your partner? If so, swinging may be the perfect fit.

However, if you feel drawn to exploring sexual relationships outside of the relationship, an open relationship may be your cup of tea. And if you are excited by the idea of ​​participating in multiple emotional and even romantic relationships, then polyamory might be your best option.

To start

1. Talk, talk and talk some more. The key to introducing non-monogamy into your relationship It’s about open lines of communication and respecting each other’s boundaries.

2. Decide what you want. Ask yourself if you are looking for a third party, group sex, partner swapping, etc. Do you want to limit the type of sexual activity you participate in (a “gentle swap” = touching and oral sex without penetration).

3. Do research TOGETHER. Since swinging is a group activity, you need to be equally involved in finding meetups in your area.

4. Go for it! Once you feel comfortable and have found a group/couple/single that you want to swing with, it’s time to get started. If this is your first time, remember to check in with your partner regularly.

Do’s and Don’ts

Here are some friendly reminders about how to behave in the swingers community. When in doubt, ask! Approach people with kindness and respect and they will be happy to guide you on your journey.

Do Ask for consent. As with anything else, consent is permanent and can be withdrawn at any time. Make sure everyone you want to have sex with is comfortable and willing to participate.

Don’t do it abusing alcohol or drugs. You must ensure that you are coherent and sane in order to make judgments.

Do Come to sex parties and encounters clean and prepared. This means that hygiene is at its peak and you are well protected. Condoms and dental dams are everyone’s best friends.

Don’t do it exchanging money with people in exchange for sex. Swingers parties usually charge an entry fee, which is normal, but do not pay individuals for sex.

Do Check in with your partner. Take small steps at first and keep checking in with your partner to make sure that if emotions arise, you are there to listen and be understanding.

Don’t do it Be aggressive or rude. That’s all.

Do Prioritize your safety. If a situation doesn’t feel safe, that’s a good sign that you need to leave and make sure those around you know they can leave with you too.

According to the sexologist Doctor Ratush “Done well, the swingers lifestyle can create bonds in a relationship and give partners a way to explore their sexuality in ways that monogamy doesn’t allow. It can be a way to foster closeness and increase sexual satisfaction.”

If you’re still interested in swinging, talk to your partner about it and we wish you many sexy flamingos in your future.