Situational relationships and friends with benefits: similarities and

The modern dating world is full of new terms for non-traditional relationships, two of which are casual relationships and friends with benefits (or FWB relationships). If you’re not up on these trends, it can be hard to understand what these two relationships mean. In fact, even people who are familiar with the terms may not be able to tell the difference between casual relationships and friends with benefits.

Therefore, here we have compiled answers to questions like “what is a situational relationship”, “what does friends with benefits mean”, “what is the difference between a situational relationship and friends with benefits”.

What is contextual relationship?

A situational relationship is a relationship that is not clearly defined. There is no formal commitment in this relationship.

This couple may date, make out, and engage in other couple activities, but there’s no name for the relationship. They’re not strictly dating, but it’s clear they’re more than just friends. So if you’re unsure about your relationship status and find yourself wondering, “Am I in a relationship?”, then you probably are.

Many times, this ambiguity ends up hurting one party in the relationship. When relationship boundaries are unclear, one party ends up having greater expectations and feelings than the other and ends up being disappointed.

Situational Rules

Now that we’ve established that there’s a lot of ambiguity in situational relationships, here are some situational relationship rules you should be aware of when thinking about this relationship.

1. Keep it casual: Don’t invest too much in a no-label relationship
2. Prioritize your needs: Don’t put in as much effort as you would in a committed relationship
3. Communicate with your partner: Have a conversation whenever you feel your needs are not being met
4. Respect is a must: Even if the relationship is not official yet, don’t let your partner abuse you

Related reading: 21 Signs of Lack of Respect in a Relationship

5. Pay attention to other aspects of your life, too: Situational relationships are usually just short-lived connections. Treat them as such – don’t make them the center of your universe.
6. See other people: If your relationship is not exclusive, you can explore other options without feeling guilty
7. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell: Your Partner Doesn’t Need to Know Who You’re Dating, and Vice Versa

Related reading: When someone says they’re looking for “something random” what does that mean?

What are beneficial friends?

Now let’s discuss what friends with benefits means. In a friends with benefits relationship, the participants consider themselves friends, except for the physical intimacy with each other. Similar to a casual relationship, there is no commitment between them. They may enjoy spending time together, but not in a romantic way.

People choose friend-help arrangements for different reasons, such as:

• They may want to explore their sexuality in a safer environment
• Intimate sexual contact with acquaintances may be safer than having sex with strangers
• They are physically attracted to their friends, but not romantically.
• They hope that this friends-with-benefits relationship can develop into a deeper relationship

Related reading: 20 Signs He Wants Us to Be More Than Friends

Friends Benefits Rules

Now that we’ve discussed what FWB is, it’s clear that even though it’s more defined than a situational relationship, it can still be tricky territory to navigate. Similar to situational relationship rules, we’ve put together these friends with benefits rules to help you protect yourself:

1. Choose the right partner. Choose someone you desire physically, but don’t want to create a strong emotional connection with.
2. Set clear boundaries: Understand each other’s expectations before establishing a friendship
3. Limit any form of emotional vulnerability to a minimum to avoid any unwanted feelings
4. Protection is a must: STIs don’t care if your relationship is official
5. Avoid sleepovers: Pillow talk is dangerous, and eating breakfast together is strictly a couples activity
6. Explore your fantasies: This is a judgement-free zone, make the most of it! (with consent, of course)

Situational Relationships and Friends with Benefits: Similarities

Sometimes it can be difficult to differentiate between a casual relationship and a friends with benefits relationship. That’s because, although they are different types of relationships, they do exhibit some similarities. Here are some examples:

Casual Relationship

Both casual relationships and friends with benefits relationships are casual relationships that don’t involve commitment or romance. A post on Reddit asked people what a casual relationship meant to them, and here are some characteristics of some common responses:

• No commitment
• short term
• Not necessarily monogamous
• In stable relationships, dating is less frequent than expected
• Don’t introduce your partner to friends and family because it’s not a serious relationship

Of course, the terms of a relationship can vary from person to person, but these are some common characteristics of a casual relationship.

Related reading: The Complete Guide to “We Act Like a Couple, But We’re Not Officially a Couple”

Physical intimacy

Both relationships involve physical aspects. FWB involves primarily only sex, as the name suggests. These partners are no more than friends emotionally.

Likewise, most relationships involve physical intimacy as well. There may or may not be an emotional connection, but most, if not all, relationships involve some form of sexual activity.

No future plans

Whether in a casual or friends-with-benefits relationship, participants prioritize enjoying the present moment over planning for the future together. They follow a “let it be” mentality.

Neither of these relationships involve any long-term commitment, such as living together or getting married. In fact, most people choose casual relationships precisely because there is no pressure to commit.

Related reading: Understanding the dynamics of short-term relationships

Ambiguity and potential heartbreak

We’ve already discussed how relationships can become fuzzy. Lack of boundaries and communication makes relationships a guessing game for both parties, leading to a lot of confusion.

Even in friends with benefits relationships, unclear boundaries can lead to miscommunication and unfulfilled expectations, so both relationships can lead to heartbreak if one partner ends up developing feelings for the other.

Situational Relationships and Friends with Benefits: The Difference

In a situational relationship, the only defining factor is that the partners are more than just friends. No other elements are clear. You can date, do other couple activities, cuddle, and even have sex. Every situational relationship may be different.

The problem is, these things aren’t even discussed between the parties. So while one partner may be content with casual flirting and the occasional date, the other may be looking forward to more.

On the other hand, a friends with benefits relationship is clear in what it means. Both parties know what they want from the relationship and have communicated this to each other. Let’s discuss the differences between a situational relationship and a friends with benefits relationship.

Related reading: 10 signs your relationship is just a fling

Label

The main difference between a casual relationship and a friends with benefits relationship is that, unlike a casual relationship, a friends with benefits relationship gives their relationship a label. The answer to the question “what is a friends with benefits relationship” is clear and unambiguous – it’s clear that you want to remain friends while still having physical intimacy.

On the other hand, a big red flag of situational relationships is that they are ambiguous relationships and sometimes people don’t even know they are in such a relationship because their relationship has no label.

Expectations of each other

Another key difference is the clarity of expectations. In a friends with benefits relationship, both parties usually understand what is expected of them in the relationship. However, in a casual relationship, expectations are often unclear because they have never been discussed between the two parties.

For example, my colleague Ashley was in a relationship with a man who didn’t ask her out. This constantly upset her because he would just ask her out without planning any dates or activities. But she couldn’t ask him out because they hadn’t made any commitments and therefore had no obligations to each other.

After some encouragement from her friends, she finally talked to him about it. It turned out he was just looking at this as a sexual relationship and thought Ashley felt the same way. As you might guess, it didn’t end well.

Related reading: Expectations in Relationships: The Right Way to Manage Them

Emotional connection

FWB relationships are purely physical. Both parties agree from the outset to keep the relationship casual, leaving no room for any emotional connection. In contrast, if you ask yourself, “Am I in a ‘situational relationship’?”, you are likely feeling some form of deep emotional connection, perhaps even romantic feelings. These feelings make things more complicated. Especially when they are one-sided.

boundary

Continuing with the theme of clarity, FWB arrangements typically include clear boundaries set at the beginning of the relationship, such as the frequency of physical intimacy, whether or not to make the relationship public, and possibly the duration of the relationship.

On the other hand, situational relationships are mostly adrift, with many factors left undefined. This is one of the red flags of situational relationships, and it can make those involved miserable. It can put those who develop feelings into a “will we?” dilemma.

Exclusivity

In most FWB arrangements, partners allow each other to see other people because their relationship is purely physical and no emotional commitment is made. However, since the situational relationship has not been clearly defined, it is difficult for partners to determine whether there is commitment because this issue has not been discussed between them.

Final Thoughts

While casual relationships and friends with benefits are similar in some ways, they are different in many ways. Friends with benefits relationships are clearly defined, with established boundaries and expectations. However, casual relationships are more ambiguous on these issues. However, when dealing with either friends with benefits or casual relationships, you need to be careful to avoid developing emotional attachments.

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