Sex and Happiness

Sex and happiness, what qualifies as happiness or happy sex? Well, happiness is in the eyes of the beholder. You have to stop and think about what makes you happy. First you need to be happy with yourself. Do not rely on others to make you happy. Happiness starts with you. Do not worry, happiness can be as simple as a smile.

When you smile, you are bringing happiness into your life. A smile is also known to be contagious. When you smile, you are putting forth confidence, a better state of mind. Researchers have found that people who smile are attractive.

Whereas, the complete opposite for the non-smiling people, they were considered less attractive. Not only did all sexes think smilers are attractive, but they were also very drawn to them. One of the first things most guys notice is the smile on your face.

There is something to be said that happy people have happy sex. If sex is consensual and the people are into each other, it is almost always a winning combination.

You might be thinking, how much sex does one need to be happy? When this subject was studied, researchers found that one time a week was very satisfying for both parties.

Another interesting fact was that people had an appreciation with life. There were more “positive emotions” for all involved when experiencing sex once a week. The researchers found a decrease in depression could free up space for the happy emotions.

In this same study, when considering sex more than one time a week, surprisingly, an increase in sex did not make them happier.  What was found out was that increasing your sex level could actually make the sex less good, hence making the enjoyment level decrease, thereby lowering the happiness level in their life.

The time in a relationship can play a role in one’s happiness too, and vice versa. When the relationship is new, every touch can make you smile with added anticipation, thereby making the experience a full-on occurrence of unadulterated joy.

In the chart below we are looking at ways to achieve better sex. Keep in mind, these tips are different for all and some you may prefer more than others.

Obviously, if you do not like one of these helpful tips, it is not going to make you happy. So, do not do it. Age does play a role in what might help you to have a better sex life.

11 Ways To Help Yourself To A Better Sex Life

• Educate Yourself
• Give Yourself Time
• Use Lubrication
• Maintain Physical affection
• Practice Touching
• Try Different Positions
• Write Down Your Fantasies
• Do Kegel Exercises
• Try To Relax
• Use A Vibrator
• Do Not Give Up
• From: Harvard Health Publishing, Harvard Medical School,11 Ways To Help Yourself To A Better Sex Life (March 5, 2024)

This next chart looks at ways to make you happy daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly. You might be asking, why should I incorporate this into my schedule? Because happy people attract similar things to their life, you want to be around happy people.

How to Be Happy: 27 Habits to Add to Your Routine

Daily Habits

• Smile
• Exercise
• Get Plenty Of Sleep
• Eat With Mood In Mind
• Practice Gratitude
• Give A Compliment
• Breathe Deeply
• Acknowledge The Unhappy Moments
• Keep A Journal
• Face Stress Head-On
• Avoid Comparing Yourself To Others

Weekly Habits

• Declutter
• See Friends
• Plan Your Week
• Ditch Your Phone
• Get Into Nature
• Explore Meditation
• Consider Therapy
• Find A Self-Care Ritual

Monthly Habits

• Give Back
• Take Yourself Out
• Create A Thought List

Yearly Habits

• Take Time To Reflect
• Plan A Trip
• Let Go Of Grudges
• Take Care Of Your Body
• Reevaluate Your Goals
• From: Healthline, How to Be Happy: 27 Habits to Add to Your Routine (March 10, 2023)

Psychology Today (February 2, 2023) came up with 12 Predictors of a Satisfying Sex Life. This list combines good sex and a happy self to equal the ingredients to a happy sex life.

• Happier Relationship. Sex is better when you and your partner are happy with your relationship
• Better Sexual Communication. You and your partner talk about your wants and needs.
• Less Pornography Consumption. Studies have shown that consuming pornography leads to lower sexual satisfaction, for the person viewing pornography and for their partner.
• Frequent Hugging And Kissing. This is referred to as non-sexual physical intimacy and has been associated to more gratifying sex. Kissing and cuddling after sex leads to an afterglow, which in turn leads to a happier sex life.
• Greater Intimacy. The feeling close to your partner is associated with greater sexual fulfillment.
• More Frequent Sex. Having frequent sex once a week is a predictor of sexual satisfaction.
• Variety. It is the spice of life. Having variety has also been shown to be important. Couples who enjoy different types of sex (intercourse, oral) have a greater appreciation of sex.
• Equality In Sex Initiation. Keeping a level playing field when having sex. Sex should go both ways. Culture does play a role in this.
• Compatibility. Couples with similar turn-offs and turn-ons (for example, delight in “talking dirty” during sex) are more satisfied than those who are of a different mind.
• Healthy Sexual Function. Health problems having to do with sex like sexual dysfunction, pain during sex, or difficulty maintaining an erection, will lead to lower sexual satisfaction for both partners.
• Consistent Orgasm. Having orgasm is “a significant predictor of a satisfying sex life” because of the positive effects on partner intimacy and trust.
• Life Satisfaction. “A happy life and a happy sex life tend to go hand in hand.”

In conclusion, try to find out everything you can to allow yourself to have great sex, like eating healthy, exercise, toys. Then try to find out what makes you happy as a person. It will not happen overnight. Use the charts; they help set daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly goals for you to try to achieve. Finally, combine the two: a great you and a great sex life equals a happy and satisfying sex life. A happy sex life will happen if you have fun and always keep things consensual.