Review: Funzze Glass Tentacles – Princess Preview

I like Browse Funzze’s New Arrivals section to see all the latest sex toys they have to offer. Not only are they a surprisingly high-quality and enjoyable product for a white label retailer (so much so that they dominated last year’s top 10 sex toys), but they’re also cheapest in the market. So when I saw recently that they had launched a new line of glass toys my first impression was one of excitement, especially when I noticed their glass tentacle dildo, a style I’ve been meaning to review long time. But…after this initial reaction, I hesitated. Although I often talk about glass sex toys and their safety, I’ve actually only reviewed a few, and that was a while ago. To make things even more uncertain, the Funzze option is made from borosilicate glass, but not annealed. I ended up doing a lot of research and you can probably guess the results…

Is it safe?

So yeah, I decided to review the Funzze Glass Tentacles. At least, as long as I didn’t find any problems upon arrival. Borosilicate glass is great because it makes the dildo stronger and less likely to break, but annealing is a process you really should want your toy to go through. It eliminates the pressure points in the dildo that are most likely to cause problems, creating an overall safer product. At first, I thought the Funzze’s choice not to be annealed would be a big deal for me, but after reviewing Dangerous Lilly’s Glass Dildo Safety Guide, I was convinced. As she points out, while annealed toys are safer, unannealed products are still less likely to break, especially if they are properly cared for and inspected before each use. This was the first thing I did when the glass tentacles arrived, and next I decided to follow the same guidelines in order to “see” how much pressure this dildo could actually hold.

Using a circularly polarized lens in a dark room with a bright white computer screen behind me, I was able to view any stress points within the Funzze glass tentacles and any other glass product I wanted. This was my first time trying it and it was actually pretty cool and very effective! You can see the results above, but basically the toy seems to be only slightly stressed and not at all the rainbow that I would expect from an unannealed one. This mainly revolves around the smaller handle end of the toy and the middle of the shaft. It’s not as good as Lovehoney’s glass dildo I also tested, which is almost transparent, but compared to my Pyrex measuring jug and some of the toys I’ve tested from Dangerous Lilly, it does look great. So using Funzee as usual I am happy with the quality of the product and although I will continue to check it before each use and be very gentle with it I do feel it is safe to use.

Product Description

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s talk about the Funzze glass tentacles themselves. The shape is similar to the letter S, with the insertable end having a slight curve and a very small taper, while the handle (more like a tentacle) has a wide curve and a huge taper that almost completely wraps it around so it ends in a thin point. Then a row of raised “suckers” appear on one side, although they’re actually more like little spikes. Since it’s made of glass, the rest of the G-spot dildo is clear and smooth, but the spiral effect is visible on the inside. The “bubbles” that make up this interior design are green, and it’s these bubbles that glow in the dark, another great visual feature of this toy. Also, it’s worth pointing out that this is a fairly small dildo, with an overall length of 6.6 inches/16.8 cm, an insertable length of 4.7 inches/11.9 cm, and a maximum diameter of just 1.14 inches/2.9 cm. Funzze glass tentacles are body safe and waterproof, as well as anal safe.

Package

I placed an order for glass tentacles with Funzze on July 19th and received them on the 28th. As is always the case with the brand, the box is 100% discreet, with no mention of the sender or what’s inside. Another consistent aspect I like about Funzze is their packaging, and the glass tentacles are no exception, coming in a simple cardboard box with just a removable strip of paper on top for maximum reusability and Discretion. Also, since it’s made of glass, the toy is packaged very securely, with plenty of bubble wrap and soft bags to keep it safe, and special attention is paid to protecting the curved handle. Additionally, the toy comes with a small card detailing Funzze’s one-year warranty, as well as a gold branded storage bag that fits the glass tentacles perfectly, although as it’s only made of thin material it doesn’t offer any Protection, so I chose to keep a small padded pouch that came with the toy for use in addition to the storage bag.

my experience

Between the smooth glass material and the toy’s small girth, inserting the Funzze glass tentacles is very easy. Plus, if it’s cold out, this toy is also great for temperature play, and you can warm it up (or cool it down!) by running it under the tap or placing it in a bowl of water before playing. Still, there are a few “fools” to contend with. I don’t find these to be very noticeable during play, and while my initial impression of this toy is that these are good for grinding (which will be my backup if I ever decide this toy isn’t safe to insert), I find they have a lot of Hard to combine with their pointed shape and not that comfortable on my clitoris and vulva. Not to mention they feel completely different than the suction cups on other tentacle toys I like, a fact that doesn’t help when you consider they only have one row. The sensation persisted during penetration, as the broad head of the dildo did nothing to support the tentacle fantasy, and as the suction cup scraped against my entrance, the whole experience felt a little off. For most people, I don’t think this will be an issue because while the suction cup does make insertion a little uncomfortable, it wears off pretty quickly. but as tentacles enthusiast Who likes the role play aspect of these toys, this isn’t the tentacle… at least as far as my vagina is concerned.

Once inside, things improved dramatically, as it was obvious that the Funzze glass tentacles not only knew where my G-spot was, but also what to do with it. Stimulation was easy as all I had to do was push gently and the curved head simply “hooked” and really did all the work. this feeling greatalthough I can’t help but think it would be better if I could add some of my own stress on it. Frustratingly, however, I couldn’t achieve this for long due to the weird handle shape and those raised suction cups, and while I could keep trying and forcing it, it would require me to apply force to the most delicate parts of the glass toy Huge pressure areas don’t seem wise. Even without this, using the glass tentacle is still a really good time, and paired with a clitoral vibrator like the We-Vibe Touch X, I know I’m going to have some very satisfying (often multiple!) orgasms .

luminous

I also have to give a huge thumbs up to the glow-in-the-dark effect of the Funzze glass tentacles. This is my first glass glow-in-the-dark toy, so I’m not quite sure what to expect, but usually with silicone you need to “charge” it under a light for at least 30 minutes before playing with it. However, when I first put this toy into a dark room to improvise and observe what it would look like, I was completely shocked by how bright it was! The Funzze Glass Tentacle is one of the most vibrant, brightest glow-in-the-dark toys I’ve ever tried, giving off an amazing glow without any charging time. The green is also particularly great as it really reinforces the tentacle theme and also makes it the perfect toy for spooky season. Plus, because the glow comes from those spiral bubbles, it adds a whole other element that makes it really stand out, while also lighting up the rest of the dildo’s clear body, almost like there’s a firefly captured inside.

Cleaning and maintenance

Since the Funzze glass tentacles are waterproof, cleaning is easy. First, I recommend soaking them in warm water and then cleaning those suckers with a soft, spare toothbrush and soap before rinsing. Let it air dry, then place it in a storage bag to keep it clean, then place it in one of the included padded bags. Make sure to always treat it gently, and before using it, you’ll want to give it a quick inspection to make sure there are no potential issues, such as cracks or chips. As for lubricants, this toy is compatible with all types.

final thoughts

it has so long I didn’t even realize I had started to hold back on glass toys since the last time I used them. But if anything could change my mind, it would be tentacle toys. As far as I can tell, the Funzze glass tentacles are made from borosilicate glass, which is fairly well researched even though it’s not annealed, and while I do exercise caution when using sex toys, I’m happy to report that I don’t have Have been having problems using it. i have used it havewith its G-spot stimulation, this little dildo made me almost addictive and had a hard time stopping during a single orgasm during testing. In fact, the only downside to this toy is that there are so few tentacle It actually creates problems. But like I said, I don’t think most people would really mind this, and even if Funzze went for the full fantasy and made it look like one of my Uncover Creations grinders, it still might not really work with solid materials . Finally, the last thing I want to note is that this toy is also very Budget-friendly, so much so that it’s actually one of the cheapest sex toys I’ve reviewed. So if you want to try a glass dildo, or just want to get some wonderful G-spot stimulation at a cheap price, this is a really good option.

You can buy the glass tentacles directly from Funzze for just AU$43/US$29.99!

Last updated: 09/30/24

Price at time of writing: AU$43/US$29.99

This post is sponsored by Funzze, but as always, all opinions are my own. Affiliate links are used in this post.