Interview With John Wilder

Welcome to our interview with John Wilder. He is stepping into an exciting new chapter as he introduces his upcoming marriage seminars this fall. With a rich background in personal development, John is on a mission to help couples strengthen their bonds and navigate the complexities of their relationships.

His seminars are designed to be deeply engaging and insightful, offering tools and strategies to enhance communication, resolve conflicts, and boost intimacy. Each session is thoughtfully crafted, combining interactive workshops, enlightening talks, and personal reflection opportunities. This approach ensures that every couple can benefit, regardless of the stage of their relationship.

John’s commitment to helping couples doesn’t stop at the seminars. He believes in the power of ongoing learning and will provide continuous resources and support to participants. This makes his program not just a seminar but a lifelong learning journey to foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

As the seminars approach, it’s clear that John Wilder’s passion for making a positive impact will offer many couples the chance to transform their marriages into more meaningful partnerships. This initiative promises to be a transformative experience for anyone looking to deepen their connection with their partner.

Tell me about yourself

I am a 68 year old man starting a new business delivering marriage seminars around the country. I will teach couples how to have a sex life beyond their wildest dreams. (sadly there is no “school for sex” to teach men how to give their women great sex.) I will also teach them how to stop fighting forever. Sadly no one is teaching these valuable skills which don’t come naturally, what comes naturally is fighting.

What inspires you?

God inspires me and the fact that so many young girls are raped by mama’s new boyfriend or stepdad. The Bible talks about the lack of natural affection. This is so true with men with young girls in the house that they have not fathered.

What inspired you to become a marriage, relationship and sexual coach?

I was inspired to become a coach to solve the problems that traditional marriage counselors don’t solve. Couples fight about the big 3 money, sex and kids. Graduate school offers no sexual education for counselors so that they can’t and won’t help you with your sexual issues. Counselors also don’t teach conflict resolution skills either.

Why do you find adults need to be re-educated about sex?

Couples need to be re-educated about sexuality because often in church little girls are taught incorrectly that: “sex is bad, dirty and wrong and that good girls don’t do it”. By the time she is ready to embrace her sexuality she is often filled with negative harmful inhibitions that cripples her ability to fully embrace her sexuality. I recently read a blog by a woman who still feels guilty for having sex with her husband.

What is your favourite sex-positive message from the Bible that we never heard in a church? How would you encourage religious couples to view sex positively?

Favorite verse:

18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.19 [Let her be as] the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. Proverbs 5:18-19

Ravished is just a Biblical word meaning GREAT SEX. Men also get great comfort from women’s breast. Too often women just lay there and let him nuzzle and suck on her breasts but don’t do anything to embrace him. Imagine how he would feel if she wrapped her arms around his head lovingly and encouraged him. Good sex is the glue that holds marriages together and gives them great joy. And God made it for our pleasure.

What are the main problems that you find couples need to talk about?

The classic problems are money, sex and kids.

How would you encourage couples to openly talk about their relationship problems? What are the keys to success in a happy marriage?

They need to be taught how to discuss without fighting.

divorce

How does divorce impact children?

How divorce affects children. Judith Wallerstein did a long term study of 200 kids growing up in a single parent family and the negative stats are literally staggering.

How can divorce be prevented?

Most people who get divorced really don’t want to get divorced they just want the pain to stop. Sadly marriage counselors don’t show them how and they mistakenly believe that their marriage can’t be saved. It can if they are taught correctly.

Tell me about the services that you provide? Where can people find you?

I used to do individual marriage relationship and coaching services. The problem with doing it one couple at a time does not begin to stem the avalanche of divorce in our country so I will be doing it in seminars where I expect at least 200 couples to attend the seminar or more. I am in the process of building a website, HAPPILY EVER AFTER SOLUTIONS LLC.

That Is All For Our Interview Thank You Very Much

7 Reasons Why Marriage Councilors Like John Wilder Are A Great Idea:

Enhances Communication: Helps couples develop stronger communication skills for clearer and more effective conversations about needs and desires.
Resolves Conflicts: Offers tools and strategies to manage and resolve conflicts, fostering a healthier, more peaceful relationship.
Reignites Intimacy: A marriage and sex counselor can play a crucial role in reigniting intimacy between partners. They offer tailored techniques and exercises designed to enhance closeness and trust, facilitating a deeper, more meaningful connection. This revitalization of intimacy can transform a relationship, bringing partners closer and reigniting the spark that may have diminished over time.
Facilitates Personal Growth: Encourages individual development and self-awareness, which are crucial for healthy relational dynamics. This process often involves exploring each partner’s desires and boundaries, encouraging open and honest communication about their needs.
Navigates Life Transitions: Provides support and guidance through significant life changes, such as parenthood or career shifts, which can impact relationships.
Improves Relationship Satisfaction: Helps couples understand each other’s perspectives better, leading to increased empathy and satisfaction. By addressing emotional blocks and fostering a supportive environment, the counselor helps couples rekindle passion and intimacy, strengthening both their sexual and emotional bonds.
Prevents Issues from Escalating: Identifies and addresses small issues before they become major problems, helping to sustain long-term relationship health.

Meet Sexpert, our full-time sex blogger! With a background in women’s lifestyle blogs, she brings expertise to Adultsmart and runs Good Girl Guide too.