According to sexologist Rebecca Alvarez StoryPhone sex is one of the most underused ways to turn someone on. When you think of being sexy, ear romance might not be the first thing that comes to mind.
But, she said, “the sound of someone’s voice and moans can be very arousing.”
Not to mention that even if your partner’s hands, tongue or hot body are not immediately accessible, your own hands And toys and imagination are there if you want them!
Maybe you’re in a long-distance relationship and want to keep things interesting, or maybe you’re just in the mood to woo your latest potential lover on Tinder from the comfort of your own home, or maybe your significant other travels a lot for work. Hell, maybe you just enjoy making inappropriate (but consensual) calls to your partner while they’re at work. Whatever the reason, you’re not doing it. need a reason to explore all the avenues of excitement available to you.
Sure, the idea of phone sex might make you shudder, but don’t give up until you try it! While we’re all so well-equipped these days with tools like Zoom, FaceTime, Skype, etc., etc., etc., sometimes it’s even more exciting to use your wild imagination.
Here are some tips to help you get started!
1. Ask for consent
Consent is the kind of thing you should ask for every time. If you and your partner have never done it before, you can float the idea in a casual moment or over text, if that’s more comfortable. If he doesn’t seem entirely comfortable with the idea, you can start a conversation to explore it further. Maybe he’s more comfortable with visual cues and video is a better choice. Or maybe he’s just shy. It might be easier to start by sexting instead, and gradually get more comfortable (and excited) with the idea. And if phone sex dates are already a regular part of your relationship, it’s okay to check in with your partner ahead of time to make sure he’s in the mood for it rather than forcing it on him. Plus, anticipation is the best foreplay.
2. Strengthen your vocabulary
Phone sex is much better when you use active verbs like suck, twist, caress, tickle, pull, push, lick, stroke… Maybe your vocabulary doesn’t need any reinforcement. But if you feel like you could use a little guidance in the word department, consider putting yourself more in a sensual frame of mind by reading or listening to eroticOr watch porn. Not only will this clarify the type of exchange that transforms You but it will also make your head dance with all sorts of ways to use your words with bad intentions. All that being said, if you and your partner have never resorted to any form of dirty talk (or even if you did), it’s always a good idea to check what types of language actually turn them on (as opposed to what turns them off) – like the words they prefer to use to talk about their genitals, for example. And while you’re at it, feel free to share your own preferences. After all, it’s supposed to be a turn-on for everyone involved!
3. Set the mood
Even if you don’t prepare the ground for a visual During your visit, you should do whatever you can to feel sexy and in the zone. This may mean lighting candles or incense, and/or wearing something that makes you feel sexy, whether it’s high end lingerieor sweating. Because when you’re feeling sexy, it’s going to come across in your voice, “nam he says”? If you and your partner plan the session ahead of time, maybe he’ll want to jump on the vibe train too.
4. Be creative
If you’ve ever taken a creative writing class, the most repeated advice applies here as well: Show, don’t tellWhile technically everything you say is “revealing,” the idea is to “show” by being as descriptive as possible. What better way to be present in the visceral, sensual realities of the flesh? The more details you capture, the more you’ll spark your partner’s (and your own) imagination. Explain what you’re doing to each other as you do it. Ask lots of questions: about what he’s wearing/doing; what he thought about the last time he masturbated; how he wants you to touch him; or where he wants you to put your hands/tongue. You can also use phone sex as a way to explore fantasies that theoretically turn you on but you know you wouldn’t want to try in person (i.e. double or triple penetration). Whatever you do, don’t rush it. Phone sex, like in-person sex, is best served slowly. Tip: When in doubt, whisper: Just about anything can sound sexy if you whisper it slowly.
5. Touch yourself
Touch yourself absolutely. Ultimately, hot phone sex usually comes down to a shared experience of masturbation and a simultaneous conversation. Feel free to touch yourself, if you want, as this will keep you aroused and in the moment. If you want to use a toy, pull it out and tell your partner. Don’t worry about getting so aroused that you lose track of the conversation. Every breath and every sound you make is part of this exchange. If you realize you’re about to orgasm, share the moment with your partner by saying, “I’m gonna cum,” or Whatever phrase you prefer to use. Chances are it will help them achieve this too, because hearing you cum is probably one of the most exciting experiences they can have.
6. Have a sense of humor
If you’re not used to talking dirty, phone sex can feel really awkward and a little (or a lot) cheesy. But do your best to let loose and don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself. If you’re laughing, it’s a sign that you’re comfortable with each other and having a good time. It doesn’t mean you’re not where you should be. Seriously, though: laughter during sex Never That means. Embrace joy, why don’t you?