Book Review: Letting Go by Gretchen Sisson

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I often get suspicious when someone describes a book as “important.” The word gets thrown around a lot, especially for books that deal with social justice. Yet if I had to sell a book, I’d say it’s important. give up Gretchen Sisson Say to someone in a sentence, “timely and important” might be the primary descriptor of the sentence.

Abandonment: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood is a ten-year private study of adoptions in the US that highlights a perspective we don’t usually consider – that of the birth mother. Before reading the book, I have to admit I had never noticed how little we consider the perspectives of the relinquishing parents, which was odd. Media coverage relies heavily on stereotypes of birth mothers, or focuses solely on the needs and wishes of adoptive parents. We’re also increasingly talking about the impact that adoption has on the adoptee (the conversation on #adoptiontok comes to mind), but even this is a fairly recent development.

This is why I appreciate the structure of the book: a chapter explores some aspect of adoption, and then one or two characters share someone’s story in their own words, straight from Sisson’s interviews. (I especially recommend the audiobook for this reason, as each birth mother has a different narrator, which adds to the intimacy of the reading experience.) By choosing to present their stories in this way, we are confronted with the fact that adoption is a complex and layered experience, filled with conflicting feelings. This brings some relief, sure, but also a lot of sadness, guilt, and regret.

There are countless reasons why a person might choose to give up a child, but more often than not, they feel like they have no other choice. With this in mind, it’s clear that there’s an inherent power imbalance in the current adoption system in the United States.

Which brings me to another reason I loved this book: Sisson doesn’t shy away from pointing out this power imbalance. In fact, she uses this fact to look at adoption from an intersectional lens, which I totally didn’t expect to be written by a white woman (no offense!). This is where this study shines, because it paints a very clear picture of the state of adoption, who benefits from it, who may be exploited or misled, and what goes wrong within the system.

Sisson Dobbs Decision overturned Roe v. Wadewhich is clearly not something she could have anticipated. Yet it lends the book a sense of urgency that might not otherwise have been there. That urgency is important because, as she reminds us again and again, adoption is not the direct alternative to abortion that many like to claim.

This book is thoroughly researched, well-written, and easy to read. I only have one complaint, and that is that I wish there had been more of a focus on reproductive justice from the beginning. Sisson spends a good portion of the last chapter discussing reproductive justice—history, framing, the value of more explicitly addressing adoption in the movement, etc. Based on the book’s introduction and synopsis, I would have guessed that it would at least touch on reproductive justice, but reproductive justice is often conflated with the reproductive rights movement, and I’m not sure people will fully understand the distinction after reading the book. I can understand that if this was introduced at the beginning, people who are coming to the book from a pro-life stance might be a little hesitant because they might think this book isn’t for them. But if you’re going to discuss abolition of adoption at the end anyway, you might as well get off on the right foot, you know?

Who should read this book

I don’t think anyone reading this review would think that their personal values ​​and beliefs should dictate how others treat their bodies.

That said, I understand that some people are comfortable with others having abortion rights, but feel strongly that they would not choose abortion, or that adoption is a viable—even better—alternative to abortion. If this is the case for you or someone you know, this book will give you a lot of insight. It won’t necessarily change your position, but it’s important to be clear about what you’re advocating for and how that affects others. I recommend this book as a An Undue Burden: Life and Death Decisions in Post-Roe America We discussed the one written by Shefali Luthra earlier this year.

To be honest, I find it hard to imagine any group Won’t I benefited a lot from reading this book.

This is a must-read for anyone considering adopting a child. It’s also a must-read for anyone considering giving a child up for adoption. It’s definitely a must-read for anyone interested in reproductive justice and the future of abortion rights in America. And it’s at least an interesting and worthwhile read for anyone who knows someone in either camp.

My Final Thoughts

I think give up This book will stay with me for a long time. It has given me a lot to think about and has already sparked many conversations in my life. Also, as someone whose academic background is in social science research, I absolutely love a book with a methodology section, plenty of footnotes and endnotes, and clear definitions of terms.

I sincerely hope that you get a chance to read this book and share it with others who may find it valuable.