Best sex positions for beginners

Have you ever wandered into the sex section of your local bookstore and flipped through those intimidating encyclopedias of sexual positions? If you’re new to the world of sexual exploration, don’t start here.

Here’s the thing: about 85% of poses are variations on basic moves, which we’ll explore in this guide. But more importantly, unless you’re an Olympic gymnast or someone who really enjoys athletic challenges, 75% of pretzel-like poses are not designed for real fun. What about reality? You don’t need to master a “butter churn” to excel in bed.

As a sex educator with years of experience helping people discover their potential for pleasure, I’m here to share some essential positions to help you feel confident, comfortable, and truly sexy. Remember, everyone’s body reacts differently – what’s incredible for one person may not work for another, and that’s completely normal.

“Sexual satisfaction comes from knowing your body and communicating openly with your partner, not from performing complicated positions,” says Dr. Eli Coleman, sexologist and founder of the Institute for Sexual Health.

What makes sex positions suitable for beginners?

Before we dive into specific positions, let’s determine which ones are ideal for someone just starting out on their sexual journey:

• Comfort and control: Position that allows you to adjust depth, speed and angle
• Low physical requirements: Movements that do not require a lot of flexibility or strength
• emotional safety: Positions that promote intimacy and communication
• happiness potential: Provides good stimulation position for multiple erogenous zones

Research published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy highlights that “sexual satisfaction is more strongly related to comfort and communication than to various positions.” Understanding different types of orgasms and anatomy can also help you choose positions that maximize your pleasure potential.

1. Missionary Position: The Foundation of Intimacy

Despite missionary’s reputation as a “boring” job, it’s actually one of the most versatile and intimate positions for beginners. This face-to-face position allows for deep eye contact, kissing, and relaxed communication—all key elements in building sexual confidence.

Why it’s great for beginners:

• Full body contact promotes intimacy
• Easy to control depth and speed
• Allows clitoral stimulation
• Great for practicing communication during sex

Pro tips from sex therapist Dr. Ian Kerner: “Missionary position allows partners to read each other’s facial expressions and respond to nonverbal cues, making it ideal for developing sexual communication skills.”

Mission variations to try:

• Legs raised: Place a pillow under your hips for a better angle
• legs wrapped: Wrap your legs around your partner’s waist
• Partner status: Have your partner stand next to the bed

Safety precautions: Avoid the “starfish” approach – actively participate through hip movement, leg positioning and touch to make the experience more enjoyable for both parties.

2. Senior positions: delegation and control

Any variation at the top gives you complete control over depth, speed, and rhythm—a crucial advantage when you know what’s good for your body. This placement is especially helpful for those working on sexual confidence and body awareness.

Benefits for beginners:

• full control Exceeding speed and penetration depth
• empower and build trust
• versatile – Suitable for beds, chairs, sofas
• Ideal for strong partners Where depth control is important

As AASECT (the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists) points out, “Positions that allow the receptive partner to control depth and rhythm often lead to greater satisfaction and less discomfort.”

Explore changes:

• classic ride: Face your partner when moving up and down
• reverse position: Turn around while maintaining penetration
• grinding motion: Focus on clitoral stimulation with circular movements

3. Spoon: Intimate and relaxing

Think cuddling and penetration—spooning is one of the most stress-free positions for beginners to sex. This side-by-side position naturally limits depth while promoting emotional intimacy, perfect for those exploring tender, intimate techniques.

Why Spooning Works for Beginners:

• Naturally shallow penetration Reduce discomfort
• Easily locate Minimize performance pressure
• intimate skin contact throughout the experience
• Easy transition From hugging to sex

Spoon variations:

• scoop face to face: Lie face to face with legs crossed
• Improved spoon: Top partner raised slightly for better angle

4. Doggy style: Explore your adventurous side

Although the name may sound a little scary, with patience and communication, doggy style can be very enjoyable for beginners.

Key considerations for beginners:

• Communication is essential: Your partner can’t see your face, so verbal feedback becomes crucial
• take your time: This position allows for deeper penetration, so start gently
• use pillow: Place pillows under your knees for comfort

Expert Insights: Emily Nagoski, Ph.D., author of Come As You Are, says, “Doggy positions are especially pleasurable because they provide great access to the G-spot, but communication about speed is crucial.”

Doggy Style Variations:

• standing variation: Bending over a bed or surface while your partner is standing
• support puppies: Use pillows or furniture to support your arms
• Modify height: Use the bedside or pillow to adjust the height

5. Position 69: Mutual Oral Pleasure

Although not penetrative, this position is a great introduction to giving and receiving simultaneously—a valuable skill in sexual exploration. For those who want to improve their speaking skills, this comprehensive speaking skills guide offers expert tips that perfectly complement the 69 postures.

Benefits for beginners:

• mutual pleasure Create a balanced experience
• side-by-side approach Less intimidating than other variants
• Very suitable for learning your partner’s response
• no pressure for penetration

69 Getting Started:

• start side by side: Easier to balance, less stress
• communication preferences: Let each other know what feels good
• don’t worry: Focus on exploration rather than performance

Basic Basics: Foreplay and Communication

Before we get into specific positions, let’s talk about what sets the stage for incredible sex: quality foreplay and open communication. Think of foreplay as the appetizer that makes the main course absolutely incredible.

If you’re new to foreplay techniques, this comprehensive guide will help you build the confidence and skills to make every position more pleasurable. Remember, communication is key! Research from the Kinsey Institute shows that couples who openly communicate their sexual preferences are 73% more satisfied.

Prioritize comfort and safety

• Use quality lubricant: Reduce friction and increase comfort
• Practical consent: Check each other throughout the process
• start slowly: Gradually increase intensity
• listen to your body: Pain is a signal to adjust or stop

Recommended products for beginners

• Our vibe tango: Ideal for added clitoral stimulation during penetration
• Wicked Water Lubricant: Water-based, compatible with condoms, long-lasting

For a comprehensive overview of the best vibrators, check out our detailed reviews of the top vibrators of 2023. If you’re new to sex toys, understanding safe materials and toy safety is crucial for both pleasure and health.

Build sexual confidence

“Sexual confidence develops through positive experiences, open communication, and a highly personal understanding of sexual satisfaction,” says Dr. Barry Komisaruk, a researcher in sexual psychophysiology.

Remember these principles for building trust:

• There is no “perfect” way have sex
• your happiness matters as much as your partner
• Progress comes through practiceimperfect
• Everyone’s body is different and respond uniquely

One of the biggest confidence killers is believing common myths about sex. Understanding the truth behind sex myths can be incredibly liberating and help you approach these positions with genuine excitement rather than performance anxiety.

Your sexual journey starts here

These base locations offer endless possibilities for exploration and fun. Whether you’re new to sex or looking to build your confidence, these beginner-friendly positions give you the perfect starting point to discover what brings you pleasure and satisfaction.

The beauty of these positions is their versatility—you can mix, match, and modify them as you become more comfortable with your body and desires. Most importantly, remember that great sex has nothing to do with athleticism or complex postures; It’s about connection, communication and shared joy.

The great thing about these poses is that there are endless variations to try, and they’re very easy to mix and match with each other when you want to switch things up a bit. They never go out of style, and honestly, most people will adopt at least one of these positions no matter how many other crazy positions they try. Whether you’re a newbie or don’t have much experience, you can maximize your use of these locations for your ultimate pleasure potential!