Anonymity and 12-Step Meetings – Sex and Relationship

The fears we don’t face become our limits.

Sometimes, especially when we are new to recovery, we resist the idea of participating in 12-step sexual recovery groups. Usually, we’re worried about a loss of privacy. This is somewhat ironic after our many years of acting out sexually—often in very public ways like putting nude pics on dating sites and hookup apps, hiring prostitutes, having affairs, using credit cards on porn sites, etc. And now we’re suddenly worried about what other people will think of our behavior? That’s a bit hypocritical, at best. Moreover, the odds of being talked about after attending a 12-step meeting are actually rather slim. Admittedly, 12-step groups are not as confidential as a therapist’s office, but the word ‘anonymous’ is part of the title of every 12-step group, and anonymity is heavily talked about and encouraged in meetings. And let’s be honest, if anyone sees us at one of these groups, it’s because they’re there for the same reasons we are.

Task for Today
Go to a 12-step meeting. Don’t worry what others will think. Focus instead on what you might gain from the experience.