FF: God designed her for sexual pleasure

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Sex is not just for men. God wants women to enjoy it too. How could I say that? Because his design leaves no other reasonable conclusion. While female orgasm is not necessary for conception, the clitoris has no purpose other than pleasure. Additionally, women can have multiple orgasms, their orgasms tend to last longer than men’s, and when they have a good orgasm, it’s far more intense than any orgasm a man has ever experienced.

Sadly, many women don’t enjoy sex, or at least they don’t enjoy it as much as they could. There are several problems here: men haven’t really tried, men don’t know how to do it, and women resist or restrict the sex. I will dedicate an article to each one.

Men who haven’t really tried:

If a man doesn’t make a real effort to provide his wife with as much sexual pleasure as possible, it’s easy for people to say rude things to him. Of course, some of these people are guilty of selfishness, but there are other possibilities:

• He didn’t know what to do and didn’t get any help or feedback from the bride. (see Tuesday’s post)
• His bride showed no interest in sex. (See Wednesday’s post)
• Exposure to porn left him with a profound misunderstanding of what women wanted sexually and how women should respond to various sexual situations. If you keep trying things you “know” and it doesn’t work out, you’ll eventually give up.
• He’s so horny for sex that he can’t see the end of his, ah…nose. This isn’t a valid excuse, but it’s easy to see why this might happen. If you have this problem, at least, you need to care wholeheartedly about her happiness after you get yours.
• He believed the lie that women didn’t really care about sex. This lie is still circulating in the church today, spread by men and women. If he thinks she “should” spread her legs and lie there, he doesn’t even know there’s a problem.
• His premarital experiences convinced him that women didn’t much want or enjoy sex. Women often view sex as the price they have to pay to date or find a husband, and it doesn’t spark her passion or joy.
• Fear. Yes, just fear of what a grumpy wife would be like. I don’t know how common this is, but several people have expressed this concern, saying “she starts wanting more than me” or “what if I can’t keep up” or “what?” if I can’t satisfy What about her? “If a man treats her like a Pandora’s Box of sexual pleasures, you can understand why he would try to prevent her from enjoying sex.
• Lazy. Generally speaking, women need more time and attention to arouse sexual desire and reach orgasm. A man who has become accustomed to his own rhythm from years of masturbation may find her rhythm frustrating. If he doesn’t understand that these are normal male/female differences, he may think there’s something wrong with her, or that she doesn’t crave orgasm.

If you’re not putting in all the effort needed to make your wife’s sex life great, ask yourself why. She needs and deserves to enjoy sex just as much as you do. Don’t be the reason she can’t fully enjoy it.

[This post first appeared Oct 22, 2012.]

Image source: © George Dolgikh | stock.adobe.com
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