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Therapist explains when to break up with a negative partner

Therapist explains when to break up with a negative partner

Here are some positive tips to help you deal with negative people.

Jeff Guenther, known online as @therapyjeff, recently shared “Eight Ways to Deal with an Extremely Negative Partner.”

Jeff Guenther, known online as @therapyjeff, recently shared “Eight Ways to Deal with an Extremely Negative Partner.”

TikTok/@therapyjeff

He first advises people to validate the negative things their partner is talking about “so they feel understood and empathized.”

Gunther noted that most people have probably tried this, but urged them to keep this in mind and try again.

“Maybe they keep repeating themselves because that’s all they need you to do. Feel free to meet them where they are, and maybe be a little negative, just don’t live there,” he said.

Therapists also recommend people get “straight up” about how their partner’s attitude affects them.

If they continue to feel negative, Gunther recommends people create a “negativity-free zone.”

“It sounds silly, but it works really well. Set aside specific time and space where the whining and grumbling just goes away,” he says.

He first advises people to validate the negative things their partner is talking about “so they feel understood and empathized.”

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Gunther also recommends that people establish “emotional boundaries” and clarify their ability to handle negative emotions.

For example, someone could set a limit and say, “I want to support you, but I only have about 15 minutes right now to listen to you vent.”

Therapists also recommend people get “straight up” about how their partner’s attitude affects them.

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Next, he recommends that people “encourage problem solving” and shift their partner’s thought process from complaining to finding solutions: “What do you think might help solve this problem?”

Therapists also recommend that people try to change the topic by changing the subject.

He also encourages people not to take their partner’s negativity personally.

If all these tactics fail, Gunther encourages people to “consider compatibility with Debbie Downer.”

“It’s okay to question if their negativity is chronic and unchangeable. If their continued negativity is dragging you down, you have the right to end the relationship,” he says at the end of the video.

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