I like to think of female orgasms as rare tropical flowers, sensitive to the slightest change in climate.
Unfortunately, mainstream porn and ignorant society in general like to pretend that women orgasm regularly simply because a penis penetrates them.
Vaginal orgasms killed the clitoris star
They really did it. Let’s break it down.
What women say:
50-80% of women typically report rarely, if ever, having orgasm during penis-in-vagina (PIV) intercourse.
What the experts say:
Experts say that most women need clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm; only 8% of women have reliable, unassisted orgasms during penetrative sex.
75% of women have difficulty having orgasms through simple vaginal penetration, and 10-15% of people have difficulty reaching orgasm. Yet many women feel like they’re doing something wrong if they can’t climax through internal stimulation alone. Do their partners climax too quickly? Not enough foreplay? Not the right kind of stimulation? It’s possible. And likely. But also: Every woman’s body is different.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2TUFA67-JU
A quick and concise timeline of scientific “discoveries” about women’s bodies
A century ago, Freud described clitoral orgasms as “immature,” stating that any woman who couldn’t achieve a “mature” orgasm through vaginal intercourse alone was “frigid.” Could this be why women started faking it? It gives me the shivers.
In the 1960s, American sexologists William Masters and Virginia Johnson concluded that female orgasm began in the clitoris and extended to the vagina, and that any pleasure a woman felt during penetration was due to the connection between the clitoris and vagina. They attributed “frigidity” to poor sexual technique (read: lack of clitoral stimulation?), rather than a woman’s femininity.
From the 1960s to the 1980s, the “sexual revolution” popularized the idea that clitoral stimulation was absolutely necessary to achieve orgasm.
In 1998, urologist Helen O’Connell of the Royal Melbourne Hospital set out to better understand the clitoris using MRI, a method that had been used to better understand male sexual function in the 1970s.
In 2005, the American Urological Association finally published one of Dr. O’Connell’s reports on the anatomy of the clitoris. His findings showed that the vagina, clitoris, and urethra can act as a “clitoral complex” during intercourse. When one of these parts is stimulated, it can stimulate the other parts.
In 2009, French researchers Dr. Buisson and Dr. Foldès made the first complete 3D solography of a stimulated clitoris. Better late than never, right? They worked on it for three years without adequate funding. It showed how the roots of the clitoris extend down behind the vulva and wrap around the vaginal opening. Think of the vagina and clitoris as a network of nerves and muscles. The clitoris actually surrounds the vagina, urethra, and anus. Rather than thinking of an orgasm as “vaginal” or “clitoral,” it makes more sense to think of orgasm in terms of the sensations that accompany or cause it. Buisson argues that the internal parts of the clitoris cannot be separated from the vagina, so neither can the types of orgasms. She believes that a vaginal orgasm is actually an internal clitoral orgasm, achieved by slightly different means than an external orgasm.
A 2012 study concluded that the G-spot is no longer considered a distinct location, but rather a “region,” and that women who claim to have “G-spots” are actually feeling a continuation of the clitoris.
Apparently, because they were bored one day, in 2014, Italian sexologists concluded that vaginal orgasms do not exist. Female orgasm is only possible if the clitoris is stimulated during intercourse, they said. Oh, and the internal/inner clitoris does not exist: the entire clitoris is an external organ according to these guys. Direct quote: “…female ejaculation…and G-spot amplification, are terms without scientific basis. Female sexual satisfaction is based on orgasm and resolution: in all women, orgasm is always possible if the female erectile organs, i.e. the female penis, are effectively stimulated.” Female penis? In 2014? Excuse me.
Semantics and bullshit
Personally, I consider all these scientific arguments to be mostly worthless semantic details. Yeah, it’s all related. No kidding. Yeah, women orgasm differently. No kidding. Thanks, science. The real problem is the (continued) herA story of misinformation and attempts to lock us in by telling us what we can and cannot, should and should not feel.
Many male (and a few female) scientists have drawn many conclusions about female anatomy. I don’t know about you, but as someone who can have multiple “types” of orgasms, I am just as offended by science’s claims that vaginal orgasms are the Holy Grail as I am by the fact that they don’t exist. I also find the distinction between a “vaginal” orgasm and an “internal clitoral” orgasm somewhat useful from an anatomical understanding standpoint, but I don’t think it’s useful beyond that. It does, however, explain why I thought I could only make myself squirt with internal and external stimulation, but later realized I could do so with external clitoral stimulation alone. If all of these are related, then the ways in which one can stimulate oneself and the ways in which one can achieve orgasm multiply.
Orgasms, Coregasms and All Other Orgasms
We now know that orgasms can occur from a wide variety of stimuli. Some women can orgasm from nipple stimulation alone. Others have deep orgasms while doing yoga. And some women can orgasm from fantasy alone. Personally, I think science doesn’t understand men’s orgasmic potential either. Sure, most men can orgasm easily compared to many women, but can’t men have deeper orgasms too? If you’ve ever explored Tantra, you know there are a lot of interesting areas that Western society tends to ignore. Imagine how much women’s sex lives would change if men explored their sexual potential as well.
Part of the general confusion and debate about female orgasms comes from the assumption that orgasms from the same source feel the same to all women. In reality, orgasms can vary greatly in sensation, duration, and intensity. The determining factor is not Or The stimulus is as important as the thoughts and emotions associated with it, i.e. self-esteem, comfort with your partner, etc. Most women can have better orgasms in some ways than others. But this not only varies greatly from woman to woman, but can also change dramatically depending on which way the wind is blowing.
The essentials
You are no less capable, sane, or sexually autonomous if you only orgasm with external clitoral stimulation, or if you only orgasm with internal and external stimulation, or if you only orgasm with a big cock stuck inside you, or if it changes for you all the time depending on who you’re fucking and how you feel about it. You are no less informed if you find that one type of orgasm is better for you personally, or if you are ambivalent about different types of orgasm.
If you want to explore your potential for new types of pleasure, you should do it. If not, you shouldn’t. It’s all good, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, baby.